Retirement is what you do between doctors appointments

Be Kind to your kids. They choose your nursing home

Don't Critcize the Coffee, You May be Old and Weak Yourself Someday

If Things Get Better With Age Then I'm Magnificent

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter

The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.

The older you get, the more you tell it like it used to be

You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.

Do not resent growing old. Many are denied the privilege.

Middle age is when you choose cereal for the fiber, not the toy

Old age is no place for sissies

Once you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed

Of all the things I've lost... I miss my mind the most